I want to take a moment to be thankful for my husband. True, I don't get all his weird jokes, and I kind of wish he didn't post raunchy comments on Facebook that I am worried about my family reading. Ok, so some days it seems he doesn't understand the concept of "laundry basket", and sometimes he IS a little grumpy (from lack of sleep). But can I tell you, overall I have REALLY hit the jackpot. C is a wonderful husband, and a great partner in parenting. In a nutshell: he REALLY REALLY cares.
I went to lunch two days ago with my new co-worker friend again, and she is pretty much single-parenting 5 out of 7 days a week, with her husband on the road with work the majority of the year. I honestly can't even imagine it. I watch Emmy by myself all day on Saturday while C works, and by the end of the day I am EXHAUSTED. There are other nights when C comes home a little late from work, and while I love love love Em, and try to focus on making the most of our "just us girls" time, there are definitely evenings where I sort of count the minutes until Dada gets home.
C is great with Em. His playtime with her is both educational and silly (sometimes one, sometimes the other, but most of the time both). I feel like I can learn from observing how they interact. Even on the days when Emmy is totally mama-centric and clingy, C finds a way to catch her attention, get her to play with him, and unclench her tight hold on me just a little.
C is also very concerned about Em's well-being. Is she too hot? Is she hungry? Has her diaper been changed? Does she know enough words? What's going on with her left eye?? Sometimes living with him is a little like living with a human embodiment of that website, BabyCenter.
Not to mention that on Mondays, C's day off from work, he stays in and cleans the house (can you hear the angels singing?), so that when I get home from work and Emmy gets home from time with Baba and Grampy, our kitchen floor is shiny and our living room rug is crumbless. The house STAYS clean for approximately 20 seconds, but it is the most GLORIOUS 20 seconds ever.
Also not to mention that C is the primary bread winner for our family (I'm the primary bread baker). Also not to mention that he pays our bills (on time), that his job affords us great health care, and that he bought enough cheesecake to share with us yesterday while he was on lunch break from work. He really didn't have to call and ask what flavor I prefered, but he DID.... gotta love.
I also have to mention C is a great smoocher, and has the arms of Adonis. :)
What would I do without C? If I didn't have him as a partner in crime, I would be so far up a creek. The house would be a mess (I would try to keep it clean, but it is so hard to clean AND watch Emmy at the same time). I wouldn't have a grown-up around to share Emmy's best and worst moments with. If Em cut herself or bumped her head badly, I would somehow need to pull my own bawling self together so that I could take care of the situation... I don't know if I could do that! I wouldn't have a checks-and-balances system to make sure Emmy wasn't being neglected in some important area of child-rearing. EVERYTHING would be SO MUCH MORE DIFFICULT.
I've been writing with my grandmother about her own experience with motherhood. I'll be posting some of that conversation soon, but I can tell you now that it was hard for her. I'm not criticizing my grandfather for taking his role as provider seriously, leaving little time to raise his children - he did what he needed to do to take care of his family. My new found co-worker friend doesn't try to rose-color her own experience - it is a CHALLENGE raising a kid without another adult helping out with the child-rearing responsibilities. I don't criticize that either - I think my co-worker's husband is a loving dad and husband who has to deal with a career that demands he be away from his family the majority of the week. I'm just finding myself being super-thankful for my husband, for all that he is and all that he does for us, and for the way he REALLY REALLY cares. I love you, C.