Not-So-Great Expectations

Me and the hubby, pre-first-pregnancy, living life to its fullest.
So silly. So crazy. So UNpregnant.

Pre-pregnancy, I had certain expectations for what I should accomplish in any given day. For instance, I tried most days to get to the gym, or to at least go for a walk outside on my lunch break. I would try to look semi-presentable at all times. I would aim to eat healthy meals, and not survive on coffee alone.  I would try to post a blog on an almost daily basis. These were basic expectations, nothing too lofty, extravagant or ambitious. If I met these expectations, I would be able to check that day off as a “good day”.

Now?

Oh, how things have changed…

I’ve come up with a short list of my new expectations. Because now, at five months pregnant, it’s a good day when:

·         I don’t throw up all over the passenger seat of our car on my way into work (grabbing huge wads of baby wipes to try and contain the disaster area)

·         I manage to bring all of Emmy’s belongings, and Emmy, into her daycare without spilling several items onto the sidewalk on our way into the building (yeah, I’m a little off balance these days)

·         I walk up the two flights of stairs at work without becoming completely breathless

·         I don’t yell at anyone in a sudden burst of pregnancy hormonal-ness “You think YOU’VE got problems??? Is there a small being growing inside you, kicking your ribs every few minutes? Is a wee little alien doing cartwheels in your lower regions? No, I didn’t think so!”

·         I cough or sneeze and DON’T pee in my pants (yes, I am doing my kegels)

·         Emmy doesn’t try to kill her baby-brother-to-be by jumping on or kicking my tummy

·         A person doesn’t gasp when I tell them my huge belly is only five months preggers  (yup, lady. That’s right. I’ve got another 120 days to go. And yes, I am SURE it’s not twins).

·         I don’t accidentally drop mustard from my lunch sandwich onto my shirt, making my belly look like a big bullseye

·         I manage to poop without feeling like I am going to birth this baby right into the toilet (sorry, that’s probably TMI)

·         I can watch a tv commercial that has anything very cute (a baby, a bunny, a baby bunny, etc.) without crying

·         I DON’T secretly wish my husband was the one who was pregnant, so I could drink a very large glass of wine

And let’s face it. It’s only going to get better. Cause I know that in four months time, my expectations for a good day are going to look something like this:

·         Get more than three hours of sleep at night (not necessarily in a row)

·         Say at least one coherent sentence every 10 – 12 hours

·         Take a two minute shower at least once every two days. Ok, maybe every three days.

·         Remember my name

·         Wear something other than a bathrobe (especially when traveling outside the house)

So, what are YOUR expectations for a good day?