My Bed Killed Mickey Mouse! And Other Not-So-Bright Decorating Ideas for Kids

So I guess the nesting urge has started to kick in. C was a DOLL and removed the queen sized mattress from Em's room this past weekend, to make room for crib #2. I may be jumping the gun a little, since I am only just shy of 20 weeks pregnant, but I've also heard from many sources that if I have enough energy to deal with redecorating and organizing the kids' nursery NOW, I should just DO IT. Because who knows? In a few weeks time I may be feeling like utter crap again, and I don't know if I can (or want to) fully rely on C and Emmy for moving furniture, painting walls, and boxing up old toys and clothes.

In looking for inspiration on how to revamp Em's room to accommodate both her AND her future little brother, I have happened upon some highly ridiculous nursery design concepts, which I would like to share with you, for your amusement:

Um, no thank you. I mean, I LOVE wooden furniture. I just don't love wooden PUMPKIN furniture. Especially wooden pumpkin furniture with windows that hover a good few feet above hardwood flooring. Because THAT, my friends, is an injury waiting to happen. 

I don't watch Sponge Bob Squarepants, but even if I did, I would have to think that my love of Sponge Bob and his zany little friends would not drive me to insanity, which is obviously what happened to this little tike's mom and/or dad. I can imagine the child saying "mommy, I think I have ENOUGH Sponge Bob stuff in my room now," and the mom responding "Oh no, my child. There is NEVER enough Sponge Bob stuff."

Simply because I would not want my child to get a concussion each and every day, upon rising from their bed. See how much I love my children?

This room is like the total OPPOSITE of Sponge Bob room. When I look at THIS room, I imagine the child saying "dada, can't I have just ONE toy in my room? Just one?? I promise I won't actually PLAY with it!" And as if the starkness isn't enough, the forboding existential question mark painted on the wall above the bed is a surefire way to create deep-seeded, lifelong anxiety for junior. I imagine Woody Allen's childhood room may have looked a little something like this.

Emmy loves Mickey Mouse. But nope. Not even if we actually LIVED in Disney World, or were EMPLOYED by Disney World. Not even if our children's room was FULLY SPONSORED by Disney World. Not even if I woke up one morning to realize that two gigantic mouse ears had sprouted from my head.
I think the bed is especially creepy, cause it kind of looks like the bed landed right on top of Mickey Mouse and killed him. Just sayin'.

Stay tuned. I will probably find lots more hellaciousness to share.